Do I Have Bain Dramage?

I've noticed when I'm writing, I often screw things up, most notably omitting minor words like articles and prepositions. I'm sure you've noticed on the blog. It's aggravating, and spellcheck will not address it. If anyone knows a name for such errors, I'd like to know about it.

Typically, here's what I think happens. I'm a pretty decent typist, about 60 words per minute; I'm not a hunt-and-pecker. As I write, I compose the words in my brain, then they go into a "buffer" in my brain, and a second later I'm typing the words. That means at the time I'm typing, I'm already thinking of several words down the road. I think that's why I forget the "minor" words like articles and prepositions and why I preserve significant nouns and verbs.

What's really aggravating, is that upon rereading my writing, my mind often "fills in the blanks." The sentences make sense to me, so I miss the "minor" errors.

Anyway, I hope you're able to fill in the blanks and know that I'm not as inarticulate as I may seem.

Boxing Day = Lumps of coal

In Canada, the day after Christmas is Boxing Day. I've got no idea what that means to Canadians, but for me, it means an opportunity to dole out lumps of coal via my blog.

So who gets the coal? You'll recall some time ago, I posted a request that you post a comment to the blog, even if you just said "hi." Those of you who haven't honored my request know who you are and, now, so will everyone else. Please take this in the spirit it is intended--ABSOLUTE RAGE!

A lump of coal to:

Michelle Gremillion--Michelle works in a public library; clearly she has no opportunity to comment on my blog.
Michael Merino
Alison Neustrom
Vanessa Murphree--Vanessa is a professor of communications, so blogs may be beneath her.
Dr. Matt--After Katrina, I dabbled with a cellphone, upon which Matt chided, "Welcome to modernity." Modernity? Have you ever tried to get an email from this guy? If you want to contact him over the web, you'd better be in an on-line poker room.
Denice Bizot
Todd Michney--He should split his lump with Laura. I assumed significant others would tell the other about the blog.

Half a lump to:

Anna Maria--Anna Maria did email me about the blog which was nice, though she could have just as well posted her comments on the blog.
Bruce Owen--Same thing as Anna Maria.

A free pass to:

Angelle--Angelle also emailed me about the blog but explained she couldn't post, because her work computer prevented her.

I'd like to thank Bart for suggesting calling out these people. (And, OK, I'm not really filled with rage. Well, maybe a little, but not about commenting on this blog.)

Bah fuckin' Humbug!

Well, my main Christmas tradition, the watching of "Bad Santa," has been thwarted. I thought my DVD of it had made the trip up to Canada, but last night when I looked for it, I couldn't find it. What's really frustrating is a few days ago I was in the public library, saw their DVD copy of "Bad Santa" on the shelf, thought about checking it out just in case, but didn't because I didn't want something else to keep track of. Then, on the 23rd, "Bad Santa" was on TV. But I didn't tape it or anything. I believed I already had a copy. The universe was trying to tell me I didn't, but I didn't listen.

Why do I like "Bad Santa?" Simply because the main character strips away any illusions about this holiday, and lays bare the real significance of this holiday's primary character. (Sorry, Jesus.) Harry Shearer's latest episode of "Le Show" was pretty funny and cynical. It did some of "Bad Santa"'s heavy lifting for me this year. You can download it here.

Here's my favorite line from "Bad Santa." When a kid tells bad Santa his Christmas wish, he retorts, "Well wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first." I guess this is my way of saying I'm not feeling the Christmas spirit this year. Sorry. But for me, the thought that our society has a season in which a common refrain is "Peace on Earth, and good will towards men" does not sit well with me. I mean I find it disgusting. "Peace on Earth?" That's a punchline, really. I mean, there's no way to deliver that with a straight face. What's really irritating is the "good will towards men" part. I think that's because juxtaposed with peace on Earth, good will towards men seems so simple, such a relatively small request, and it's just as scarce as peace on Earth. So it's perversely appropriate that the culminating event in our society's season of "peace on Earth" is an orgy of consumerism. Want peace on Earth? Well, wish in one hand, shit in the other, and tell me which one fills up first.

Last night, Nicole made Christmas dinner. As we sat down to it, I played "O Holy Night" as performed by Trombone Shorty. As those sharp brass notes fell in my ears, I couldn't help it and started tearing up. As 2007 concludes, it's impossible to feel good about it. It's a year in which difficult situations have suffered serious setbacks, not just for me but my city as well, not just for my city but my country, not just for my country but the planet.

This holiday season I hope you are able to spend time with those you love and that such love gives us the courage to make this world a better place.

A Sighting

When I've seen meteors, they look like what they're called, shooting stars, a white pin point of light streaking across the sky. Recently though, I saw something else.

For the first month I was here, Nicole and I were staying in an apartment in a residential area a couple of miles outside of downtown. At night, it was really dark outside; there were no streetlights or porchlights nearby. The darkness offered a nice view of the stars, and I'd stare up at them when out there, typically when going from the car to the apartment.

One night, I was looking up at the stars when a meteor streaked into view. But it was no pin point. It was thick, about as thick as my fist. I could see the orange flame as it burned and the trail of smoke it left in the sky. It seemed to move slower than other meteors I've seen, and it seemed no higher than three stories in the air. Within a couple of seconds, it was out of view.

It seemed like a meteor completing its descent to Earth. I listened for a crash but didn't hear one. Maybe someone ended up with a piece of space rock, maybe it burned up. But it was fascinating to see.

I'm No Star Fucker

I've realized I've had a number of encounters with celebrities over the years. I've never sought that out. I attribute it to having lived in an interesting part of New Orleans, to being plugged into its interesting culture. So recently, I made a list of these encounters, and here it is.

I've italicized the names of people I had contact with, be it a hand shake, a conversation, or whatever, though if they're on this list, it typically means I had every opportunity to walk up and talk to them if I'd wanted to. Also, I've divided the list into two groups: those I just ran in to and those I saw in a performance venue. If they're listed under a performance venue, it means the venue was particularly intimate, often afterward they were just standing around approachable by anyone. So I don't include Bill Clinton and Johnny Cash on my list; there was nothing intimate about the venue in which I saw them live.

"Ran in to":
John Boutte'
Ed Bradley
Drew Brees
John Breaux
P.J. Brown
Henry Butler
Andrei Codrescu
Anderson Cooper
Edwin Edwards
Bob French
John Goodman
Darrell Hammond
Mark Harris
INXS
Jesse Jackson
Bill Jefferson
Leroy Jones
Maynard James Keenan
Mary Landrieu
Eli Manning
Ellis Marsalis
Irvin Mayfield
Matthew McConaughey
Helen Mirren
Rick Moody
Jim Mora
Ray Nagin
Cyril Neville
Shaquille O'Neal
Nicholas Payton
Sean Peyton
Sean Penn
Sydney Pollack
Giovanni Ribisi
Andy Rooney
Kermit Ruffins
Nick Saban
Harry Shearer
Pauly Shore
Britney Spears
Jim Taylor
Ricky Williams

Intimate venue:
Boston (the band)
Ray Bradbury
Stephen Colbert
Harry Connick Jr.
Ira Glass
Al Gore
Tipper Gore
Amy Goodman
Amy Grant
Branford Marsalis
Wynton Marsalis
Colin Quinn
Chris Rock
Sarah Vowell

One thought that comes to mind is: is this a long list? It seems like it for someone not involved in the entertainment business. But maybe it just seems that way. So how about it? How does your list compare?

There's a lot of people on this list I admire; the one admire most would be Al Gore.

After the blizzard

This weekend we had a serious snow storm. Nicole and I stayed indoors for much of it. The next morning I got up and walked to the Green Bean, my favorite coffeehouse here. Here's what I saw:

This is right outside our apartment building.







As I crossed the bridge over the creek, I took this picture. You can see the creek opening into Lake Ontario, with geese resting on its frozen surface.






Here's the footing on the bridge, so I'm usually not far from the hand rail. I've also learned it's better to walk on soft snow, which this is, than hard ice.







A place in downtown to cool your heels and your shins and your entire backside.






After a few blocks I arrived at my oasis of warmth.

A few days later when I walked to the Green Bean I bundled up as usual only to find myself sweating by the time I arrived. Without realizing it, the temperature had risen above freezing. Funny, when I see snow, I assume it's freezing. But the snow is melting, albeit very slowly.

Now that the temperature has risen, I'm forced to conclude that the worst is behind us and that essentially winter is over. I should be wearing short sleeves and shorts in a few weeks, not so different from New Orleans. That wasn't so bad.

Me on Stephanie Miller

Back when New Orleans had an Air America affiliate, I got hooked on the Stephanie Miller show. After the affiliate's parent company switched them to rebroadcast WWL's content, I still listened to her show over the web.

At first, I found the show too busy--lots of drops and sound effects. But her ribald sense of humor grew on me; she's not shy about joking about sex or her age. So in keeping with that spirit, I sent her an email after the fire, and she read it on the air. You can hear it here:




A few comments about the clip. I was pleased that I got some laughs out of the people on the show. I'm not 44; I just elevated my age for comedic effect. Also, I never said that her podcast got me through all those difficulties. I said her podcast got me through sifting through the rubble of my burned-out house, which it did. She edited my email for brevity's sake. I guess brevity is the soul of wit.

Also, I added the pictures of my cats just to convert the track to a video format. This blog won't allow me to upload audio tracks. I could have added pictures of the house, but I thought that would bring things down.

Leave a message!

So far, I've been pleased with the comments I've gotten from people. Tony, Bart, recently Megan, and the ever-enigmatic Lilli B. But I want more, and I know I've told more than four people about this blog.

I'm just saying, the point of the blog is to stay in touch. In emails, I've asked a few who haven't commented if they've seen the blog, and they tell me they have. Well, hell! Leave a comment! Even if you just say, "Hi, David." I'll take that to mean, "Hey, David, I'm dying for you to get back to New Orleans, so I can take you out to Commander's Palace."

It reminds me of the old proverb: If a tree falls in the woods, and no one sees it, did the tree really fall? So it is with your commenting on this blog.

Differences in Canada, pt. I

When I first visited Canada, I half-way expected it to be the US with different money, but I'm pleased to report it's not. Obviously, the two countries have a great deal in common, but living here has exposed me to some fine differences. Some observations:

When you enter someone's home, you take your shoes off. Apparently this is a habit developed to prevent people from tracking dirty slush through the house. But it's still done even before it's snowed. So a month ago, when Nicole and I visited her friends in their home, I was surprised to find myself walking around in my socks in their house. Maybe it's not just a Canadian thing but a practice done in cold climates. I wouldn't know.

American puritanism doesn't rule Canadian TV. After 9 pm, words like "shit" and "fuck" are audible on Canadian TV, and nudity isn't hidden. And guess what? Canadians aren't out, fornicating in the street, the very moral foundations of their society peeling away. I also haven't heard any stories about Tory MP's trying to pick up guys by texting their interns or tap dancing in the men's room, either.

Toronto is a diverse city. When Nicole told me this in New Orleans, I had my doubts, but she was right. But the demographics are different than a lot of American cities. There's a lot more people from the Indian subcontinent and fewer African Americans (African Canadians?). But every hue of the human race is represented in Toronto; I'm glad to see it's not lilly white.

Speaking of lilly white, there's a lot of people from the UK here. I mean, to my surprise, British accents are completely ubiquitous. Clearly, Canadians are people who did not rebel. And the British influence is obvious in the names of public places and institutions. As I've jokingly told Nicole, Canadians can't decide if they want to be British or American.

Chomsky and Ali G

The other day I was reading a blog on Salon.com which linked to a clip from "Manufacturing Consent." Now, I love me some Noam Chomsky, so I went to youtube and searched for him. I found a lot of clips, but the first one to come up was this one:



I'd never seen Ali G before, though I did see Borat and wasn't too impressed. I thought it was ungrounded and gratuitous. So I was surprised that I really found this interview funny.

So I searched youbute for Ali G and found about as many clips as I have of Chomsky. So I've been watching the Ali G clips and not Chomsky's. (Sorry, Professor.)

Here's the funniest, the one that got me laughing so hard I was gasping for air:



(By the way, Bart also got to interview Chomsky. You can find that here.)

The Weather

Here's a picture from our balcony, a lovely view of downtown Oakville.

You'll notice the creek in the foreground is iced over. Nicole tells me that eventually the ice gets thick enough to skate on. Here's us on Thanksgiving Day last month, or as the Canadians call it, Thursday.





Suffice to say, we'll have a white Christmas.

I have several reactions to this weather.

First, it's not as uncomfortable as one might think. Living here means being prepared for the cold. So that's me, wearing a took. Unlike New Orleans, the buildings are well insulated. So it's not bad.

Second, the newly-fallen snow presents a kind of beauty that's new to me. On the first morning I woke to find it snowed over, I got up and walked to a coffeehouse downtown. The sidewalks and squares had yet to be shovelled or plowed, and I was one of the first to walk through it. As I told Nicole, it was a winter wonderland.

Third, a cognitive reaction has been to have great concern for the wildlife here, like this is a disaster for them. Observing that thought, I quickly realized that that's because I was used to seeing wildlife in an environment that rarely freezes. Of course, these animals are adapted to the cold. My favorites are the Canadian geese, large grey birds with black heads, necks, and wings. They fly low in formation, honking all along.

This Ain't my First Time in the Blogosphere

I've had a blog before. Back when I was in New Orleans, I started a blog called The Drunken Vegetarian. My idea was to provide a vegetarian's restaurant guide to New Orleans, a pretty carnivorous city, and describe interesting bars I visited. I thought it was a good idea, but I made two posts on it and then quit. I've thought about why I gave it up. Well, I found managing the graphics inexact, as you can see. Also, while I loved a lot of the restaurants in New Orleans, I'd been to them a hundred times, which didn't exactly inspire writing about them. Same thing about the bars. Plus, I'm not exactly versed in idiom of food reviews.

But here's what really killed it--I realized I'm not into self-promotion. This blog was intended for general reading, for developing an audience larger than just my friends. But I have absolutely no interest in promoting myself--none. It was an interesting bit of self-discovery, and it explains a lot.

My alter ego

Willy is a lover.

Not the the Start of Something Great

Hey, everyone.

After much demand, I've started a blog.

OK, I got no demand. But after reading Bart's blog, I realized it was a great way to stay abreast of friends who are far away. So I've started mine to let you know what's going on with Nicole and me, as we get started with life in Canada. And while Bart's blog is very much a voice to the world about life in New Orleans, mine is not intended to serve such a purpose. It's really just meant as a way to keep in touch with friends. So if you and I haven't had a beer together, hit the "back" button on your browser and never return.

So what's going on with us?

Well, mostly we've been pretty damn sick. I mean, really sick. For the past week, I had one of the worst colds I've ever had. Nicole has been worse off with a cold that's just as bad but twice as long as well as an eye infection. Delightful.

Otherwise, we're house-sitting for Nicole's parents, as they're in Spain for the winter. Their apartment is in downtown Oakville, so that affords us easy access to the charming, though sleepy, downtown.

When I'm not sick, I've been doing a lot of yoga, and I love doing it. I found a really good studio, Yoga Oakville, that offers a unique deal. The studio will let students do some work at the studio rather than paying for classes, which can get expensive. So that's what I'm doing, which means on Thursday nights I spend 3-4 hours cleaning up after the last class has ended. God knows I've got the time to do it, and it's kind of like I have a job. Though, since I've been sick for the past two weeks, I've only been in the studio to clean it during that period. That should change on Monday.

I've been volunteering at a local community radio station, CHRY, which is the student station of York University. (Unbeknownst to me, York is a huge university, with a student body over 45K.) My volunteering has meant helping them with their fund-raiser and getting training to do spoken-word stories. Once my training is completed, I look forward to producing occassional stories for the station. I'd always wanted to get involved in community radio, but never had the time. So I'm seizing that opportunity now.

I've also been doing some creative writing, something I feel really good about. But I won't jinx it by saying more than that.

I'm sure one comparison to be drawn between here and New Orleans is the matter of the weather. Well, guess what? It's colder here. A lot colder. We've got snow everywhere. But it's not bad, though I'm told it will get worse.OK, I hope to hear from you. If I don't, I probably won't keep posting. So get to commenting!

David